Catching Up With Yourself

Those moments of reality when you realize your reflection isn’t quite what it used to be or your vocabulary contains phrases that are still unfamiliar to your tongue even though they’ve become a part of the everyday loop. Hold up, where did time go, since when did it all change, what happened to me doing the same job I had for years, WHOA, I live in another country and I am no longer the fresh 20 something I once was. Hey! Where the F*** did my future plan go and why I am still putting up with these internal bulls** excuses I have been telling myself day after day. Time has flown and I find myself catching up with where I really am and realizing the current life I am apparently not engaging in. The past year seems to be a blur of a substantial amounts of travel and changes I never would have thought would be served to my plate. The facts: I am living in Costa Rica, not what one would consider bilingual, waiting on a job, and have convinced myself getting back into shape is no longer an option but a must. Sounds pretty minimal, and the solutions sound fairly easy, assimilate to your new country of residence, practice Spanish, maintain patience on the job front, and work your a** out lazy! Let me laugh to myself for a moment… ahh okay then, I believe we all know our problem and seem to be the usual object of counterproductive behavior that blocks our path to bettering ourselves. What can I say, I give myself HELL like no one else’s business and the term “inner b*tch” doesn’t even cover it when it come’s to my internal arguments…which obviously I win because I’m not about to lose to that “inner b*tch”(I mean does she even really know who I am anyway). That a**hole can maintain the self destructive mannerisms of eating cake and loving on the couch potato ways for a preverbal life that I am not going to participate in. As for me, I’ll catch up with where I feel behind, I’ll accept the life abroad I was handed, and well I’m about to manhandle the lovehandles off myself. With love to the future, my muscles to be & until mañana muchachos. P.S. In Costa Rica it’s Buenas not Hola & Ciao not Adios…yes, ciao is Italian, so much for learning Spanish. -SM